Thank you again for tuning in to Feelings FM. Still as always, I'm your Feelings DJ, Ivy.
OK, the song of the day would be this: Counting Stars by One Republic.
This is my UMPH song, as in... It gives me the motivation to start something, like a starter for a car.
And particularly, that one line I really like? EVERYTHING THAT KILLS ME MAKES ME FEEL ALIVE.
And never miss, I will be like OH YEAH~!!!! AH HA~!!!
Anyway, back to today's topic.
You know I had a great day from the title alone, well judge me then... HAHAHA
INdeed, I had a pretty awesome day.
This is a day where I like people around me, I like for the fact that the world is not as materialistic or stranger as we think it is.
I like the warmth people give to me and I can't help but smile to myself thinking of everything that happen today.
It all started with the same old boring day where I get out of bed and went to the library to study.
Exam is coming up in.... 76 days... What to do? Needa buckle up and start to work my ass out...
Anyway, my day started pretty bad.
I did not had a tight sleep last night, the photostating shop I use to go can't print my stuffs due to the CD Rom error, the other shop is gonna charge me sky high. So I did not get anything right and did not get anything done.
Plus, my voice is starting to change due to the hot weather and though drinking tons of water, it doesn't help much.
45 minutes LRT ride makes me feel like jumping out of the train immediately.
Some unknown weird lady slammed herself on me and did not even apologize, not to forget a man who is standing a few meters away from me and yet I can smell his body odor... Along the way I was trying so hard to not breathe. Have you ever get into this situation where either choice makes you feel like dying?
The library was pretty quiet and cool until a bunch of Year 1 kids came in and start talking as if nobody's business. They just sat there and start chatting so loud and the librarian is not doing anything.
Damn annoying day huh?
So I finished study at 4 and went back. The weather is okay so as planned I went jogging.
I've started this running thing for like one week now... And I love it because it's the only time when "study", "cases", "judgement", "judges", "academician", "criticism" can just get outta my mind.
During every run the only thing I can think about is to keep running and break my previous record (though I did not get a good timing but it's still an achievement to break them every time... XD)
Running against the wind is so cooling, I feel the pain in my leg and lungs as I breathe but this is the time everything seems so alive.
Since I started running, I have been taking out after the run from this stall. The uncle is so cheerful and kind...
Friendly nice uncle who always asked me how is the run and telling me all his stories.
I'm not really someone who knows how to communicate but smile throughout the conversation..
At least we know someone cares...
And today, I received a surprising phone call from one of my closest course mate, Duncan.
He was like, "Hey, Ivy. Where are you? Wanna go out for dinner?"
I got a shock of my life, "Hold on, dinner? I'm at my place ady la..."
And he thought that I was still in the library and offered me a ride for dinner since the place is quite inconvenient to travel around.
At that very moment, I felt warmth crippling up my heart.
I can't explain how much that means to me...
A lone ranger finally have some friends who care... Wow...
If he ever reads this, I just wanna thank him for the offer. Thank you for all the trouble and sorry for rejecting a favor...
The last thing before I start typing this is the shop I went to.
I ordered a packet of Chinese tea after the run, just to cool down my body with dinner.
This boss was asking me if I run often and he offered me a packet of herbal tea instead of chinese tea...
I wanted my chinese tea but he insisted in getting me a packet of herbal tea, and charge me for only the price of chinese tea...
He even gave me a super full packet of drink and give me some encouragement to run more and telling me it's good to exercise often...
As I was walking back to my apartment against the cooling wind, I smile from my heart.
At least we know in such a big city, though the general rule is that people are selfish and negative...
There are people who cares and who at times offer you some warmth...
You might think that I'm stupid to get all happy for all these littlest things but isn't life suppose to be like this.
Learn and appreciate from the very littlest things and start feeling contented and happy over small stuffs... Life would really turn out to be much happier this way...
Trust me this is only half the packet... It was full!!!! LITERALLY FULL...
Anyway, come to think of it... Though my day did not start well, it was a pretty awesome day after all...
And it's time for dinner... Thanks for reading my blog and have a nice day~!
Well, I haven't been up here for quite some time now... Yikes, when was the last time again? Oh, 3 months ago... Great.
I'm you Feelings FM DJ, Ivy. Good evening and did you guys have a pleasant day? Oh, I didn't.
Let's see, 3 months, 3 months. So much to catch up, huh?
Nothing much happens actually, living life as usual. But it's getting busier, exam's approaching and ya know, law is a tough subject.
Hmm, well let's stop all the blabbering and the song I present to you tonight is Everybody Got SOmebody But Me by Hunter Hayes(ft Jason Mraz).
And the next version is a cover by Sam Tsui. Personally, I prefer Sam Tsui's version but the thing is... It's too sad. Need the ori to lighten up the mood a little.
I have been quite lazy to update my blog, putting it on hold for quite some time now. SOmehow I just decided to drop by today and just post something about how I feel recently and how my life have been.
Well, I moved to a new place in October and things has been quite messed up. No Wi-Fi makes life difficult, like EXTREMELY difficult. Don't they know that Wi-fi has been listed as one of the HUman rights now? Jeez. They needa do something bout it, man. Or else, I'm gonna bored to dead.
Anyway, after I came back to KL I 'm so busy with all my assignments and studies and catching up that I don't even have time to catch a breath. Need some Kit-Kat... But NO, no time for all the nonsense. Striking a balance between fun and studies is really hard. Making some time for my upcoming novel is even harder. Blogging... I ain't have time for that no more. Sounds pathetic right? Nah... I'm just lazy.
So, I'm changing for good. And duh~! I'm determined this time. Needa start moving my butts and don't just sit in front of the laptop and staring at the desktop all day. At least I need to do some novel writing or blogging. Hmm... Oh, and food.
I'm learning ukulele lately and needa slot time for that now. Jeez, if only I have 36 hours a day. Well, you know my way: Fun, Food, Adventures! What's life without all these and study all day? I've been quite hyper lately and can't really think straight and start getting sentimental and emotional like before, maybe when stress mode is on in say 1 month time? You'll see the depressed me again, I bet.
Good night for now and have a nice day tomorrow, rain or shine.
And for Malaysians, Happy Thaipusam this upcoming Friday.
I believe in pink. I believe that laughing is the best calorie burner. I believe in kissing, kissing a lot. I believe in being strong when everything seems to be going wrong. I believe that happy girls are the prettiest girls. I believe that tomorrow is another day and I believe in miracles.
I haven't been up here, renewing this blog for quite some time. Things come up, travelling, working, moving house and the start of a whole new semester is making me a bit dizzy... Today, at this time I decided to just talk about something that every Chinese SPM student in Malaysia are talking about and the dilemma they are facing right at this moment. I can type in Chinese and it is really better for me to do so but I want the nation to know (even for those who does not know Chinese, parents in particular) the importance of Chinese language.
I came across this online newspaper title on FB and I acknowledged the dilemma and hardship that SPM Chinese students are going through , especially those who are planning to take Chinese as one of the subjects. I gone through that, that is why I totally understand how one feels when it comes to this issue.
Malaysia, just like a lot of places in the world are having a merit based education system. Everyone is always asking, "How many A's you got for PMR/SPM?" ; "Which school are you graduated from?" ; "How is your result in school?" and so on. This education system is putting pressure on students in this nation to get a certificate and a result slip which shows "straight A's". It is encouraging in a way as student would work very hard to score for a better result, but at the same time it is discouraging as students, though scoring "straight A's" would be incompetent besides studying.
As for Chinese, it is undeniably one of the hardest subject in SPM. In fact, it is THE killing subject for those who want to score straight A's or to pass all subjects. Paper are getting tougher and tougher each and every year and many Chinese students dump Chinese because it would affect the overall result. What makes things worse is the attitude of parents who look so much into results and encourage their kids to dump this subject just for the sake of getting straight A's.
I was a 2010 SPM leaver and I was contented with my result. Before I start, let me just bring you on a tour of Chinese in my life. I was born in a family whereby my dad is a so-called "banana" and he doesn't speak a word of Chinese. My mom, though a Chinese educated person used to talk to my brother and I in English. 4 years later, I was admitted into a kindergarten where I started to learn Chinese. As a matter of fact, I did not do well for my Chinese and neither did my brother. When I was 6, my dad decided got me registered into a quite prestigious SK(at least it was in my hometown). My mom, she re-registered my name in a SJK(C) after knowing it and insisted us studying Chinese till SPM.
Seriously, I did really bad for my Chinese even up till UPSR. I was so lucky to get a pretty grades for my UPSR and went into the one and only Chinese government high school (SMJK) in my hometown. I started picking up the hobby of reading and writing novels when I was in high school to improve my Chinese. It was a big leap when we need to start learning old Chinese languages and it was a bigger struggle when I went to Form 4 where we need to translate old Chinese into modern Chinese language. My brother was facing the same problem and the idea of dumping Chinese always crossed our mind as we know that we need to get a good result to "survive". At that time, my mom insisted us on taking Chinese and my dad who doesn't read and write(though learned to speak after years of listening to our conversation) encouraged us to not give up on Chinese. In the end, I took up tuition, handed in articles, wrote novels, blogging, read more Chinese novels and finally I made it.
I got 9As out of 10 subject in my SPM and the only B+ is not Chinese. In fact, I got an A- for my Chinese.
Students and parents nowadays never find a way out, everyone just wants to get the easy way out and dump Chinese for SPM. Yes, one might say that it doesn't affect much by dumping Chinese but it doesn't affect much either picking up Chinese as one of the subject. Malays, Indians, Europeans, Americans and so many other races in the world now are learning Chinese. I have friends who are 100% English- educated begging us(those who know Chinese) to teach them how to speak, read and write.
From the global economy point of view, China is developing rapidly and it might one day monopolize the whole economy. Though English is THE language in communicating, don't you think having one more language in hand is in a more advantage position?
Sorry to say but I was never proud to say that I scored for my English in SPM because I think English is the very basic and we are bound to do well for it. As for Chinese, I am proud up till today that I have one more language in hand. It may had affect my overall grades for SPM but I never regretted for taking up Chinese. I'm glad that both my parents insisted me in learning Chinese.
Chinese, just as other language is not a formula or something dead. It represents a culture and a developing mindset of the people. The history of Chinese is dated back almost 4000 years, and it had evolve in such a way to be more reader-friendly. If you look into the language and get your passion out of it, you will see find a whole new universe in it. Chinese is not about memorizing all the points and vomit it out in exam to score an A, it is about the understanding, the appreciation, the application to go around the whole language and to make it look pretty. Just because our education system is as such where people looks at your result, by scoring a B for Chinese does not ruin the certificate. It may not be essential for college or universities application, one who take Chinese would definitely stands a better chance of getting a job in the future.
Unlike other subjects, Chinese is THE subject where most Chinese students fear of. Same goes to parents when they dreamed of their genius scoring brilliant results for SPM but with a flawed B in Chinese. Think of the good side, scoring a B gives you a better chance of getting a job in the future; getting an A tells people how strong your kids are in facing the toughest subject and still breakthrough.
So for those SPM candidates who are still in a dilemma, my advice is GO FOR IT! Do not be afraid of not scoring well, learn to love the subject and do not neglect it just because it is assumed to be not as important as other core subjects. Do not leave it aside just because it is hard and "people say it's hard to score". Try you best and face it. DON'T BE A CHICKEN!! You'll not regret it.
Disclaimer: The above blog post is only of personal point of view, it has nothing to do with anyone besides my self. Totally based on self-opinions and experience as a SPM leaver who did well(I do not know if A- is considered well for you) in Chinese language.
最近我爱上了一首歌曲：David Guetta ft. Sia 的 Titanium。
这一首歌可以说是我的正能量的来源……为什么？看看它的歌词吧！什么是Titanium？就是华语所谓的“钛”。
这一首歌的歌词很贴近我们现实社会的情形，就像是说一个人对于别人的闲言闲语、讽刺嘲笑都免疫了……
俗话说：“人言可畏。”、“一传十，十传百，百传千，千传万。”但是也有人说：“嘴巴是生在别人身上，你管他说什么？”
You shout it loud, but I can't hear a word you say,
I'm talking loud, not saying much.
I'm criticized, but all your bullet ricochet,
You shoot me down, but I get up.
*I'm bullet proof, nothing to lose,
fire away, fire away,
Ricochet, you take your aim,
Fire away, fire away.
@You shoot me down but I won't fall,
I am titanium.
Shoot me down but I won't fall,
I am titanium.
Cut me down, but it's you who'll have further to fall
Ghost town and haunted love
Raise your voice, stick and stones may break my bones,
I'm talking loud, not saying much
Repeat *@
Stone hard, machine gun,
Fired at the ones who's run,
Stone hard, as bulletproof glass
Good evening, and I'm you Feelings FM DJ... As usual, Ivy.
The song of the day would be... Here, I Dreamed A Dream from Les Miserables, violin cover by Jun Sung Ahn. I hope you like it... It is a beautifully played song...
Today's theme as stated above and I know not much people are interested when they see my title since it's not like the others post... FOOD~ OKOK, chill.. Wait till I find something special then I'll do some food review again... I can't be posting MCD food review right? Haha.
Anyway, some thoughts have been bugging me these few days. Guess is the weather? Or maybe the stress coming up for exams? Or maybe I'm thinking too much? Well, I really do not know which is which really... I've been feeling quite EMO for the past two weeks and I still cannot get over it. I wonder why but I think I know the reason... I'm too dependent on others...
I saw a post from my friend's blog: Moi et N'importe Quo... Although the title is in French, but trust me... The content is mostly in English. Well, basically I saw this post and I smiled... Because at least there is someone I know who are not really close with me knows me better than my good friends do. I'm not trying to compare here but yeah... He still understands it albeit not much who I really am.
Things have been quite bad for me these few weeks. Due to stress in examination and my own thinking, I get all the mood sways out of nowhere. This moment I can be super active, next moment my feeling was like sliding down the cliff. I do not know who I really am in my surroundings now as I don't seem to fit in after... well, almost one and a half years. Loneliness is always there and I shouldn't be showing and telling it to anyone but myself.
Sometimes, we just need someone to talk to but it's just that no one is there. I just look up and saw that my friends are all ahead of me and I'm still taking my slow step behind. People think differently and people judge others differently. I'm not really the welcomed type of person and usually, people would just hate me from the very first moment they saw me. I just portray myself as being arrogant, maybe?
Today, I posted a status on FB: "Sometimes loneliness makes you realize who you really are and what your surrounding look like... and then makes you feel that you rather be lonely..."
That's what came across my mind at that very moment. I'm afraid of a lot of things and I'm actually a big coward. I like extreme sports because that's the only way I can get hurt and reminds me that I'm actually still alive with all the things around me and to be contented of everything. I'm scared but I cannot find another way to push away the fright I have in me...
I do not expect anyone to understand what I'm going through for two reasons:
1. Every individuals have their own thinking and no one would understand what others are going through.
2. Me, myself do not know what and why I'm having all the emo moments and loneliness and sadness.
No one understands and no one will... Sometimes I just feel sad for no reason or maybe there is a reason and I do not know why.
And so, this should end because everyone would get bored and think that I'm a paranoid or so. The one thing that I always tell myself is no one will pity you and no one will be there when problem arises. The most trustworthy person is you and yourself. But sometimes that one person who understands would be more than enough and I'm glad that he described it well... Yes, I am active and lively from the outside but at the inside I'm a sentimental person...
Well, life's never easy... Tomorrow is a new day and it means a new start. Neh?
